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A Russian sub crew must avoid sinking or disgrace when their reactor breaks.

I saw K19 on the shelf and though "Oh boy! A sub movie! I like sub movies." Boys & girls, DO NOT rent this if you want an exciting sea adventure! No, really, it's very well made and it make great use of tension. But it's a miserable, unhappy, and arduous film about sacrifice, heroes, survival, and red tape. There's no climactic sub battle. No race for the treasure. Just a lot of suffering. Harrison Ford and Liam Nielson are superb, I always like them both. This is just a tough movie to watch even though it is well-made and performed. It could be a bit shorter, though.

***1/2 out of *****

Buddy/chase comedy with kangaroo.

This film got a lot of bad press, but did well in the theaters. I'm glad it managed to survive because it's really not all that bad. Sure, it's total superficial fluff, but we need more goofy comedies in these days of moody and depressing films. There are enough laughs to keep it afloat, the rapping-roo part is short enough to avoid overwhelming (but not enough to avoid being stupid), and the characters are at least likable. Sure, it's predictable, it's kiddie, and the CG is as often awful as it is good. But it's still good enough to stay out of the trash and it's easy to see why kids loved it.

**1/2 out of *****

Guy loses his daughter in Port Authority

The professional reviews for this film gave it pretty high marks, so I added it to my queue to see. As it moved up the list towards the top, the ratings on it got lower and lower. NetFlix reviewers gave it nearly one star, they really seem to hate it. So it was with trepidation that we began watching "Keane". The film is unique in that it consists almost completely of the main character whispering and muttering to himself. Having lost his daughter in the Port Authority bus terminal months ago, he's reduced by his grief and implied mental handicaps to roaming the area like a stereotypical homeless person, raving, paranoid, and attacking random people. As a result, the film seems to spend much of its time working to draw attention to the plight of people living under the poverty level. It does this very well, enough so to make much of the film very depressing and depicts the main character (whose performance by Damian Lewis is extraordinary) extremely sympathetically despite his behavior. Later in the film, it turns into an impoverished attempt at a family film, albeit extremely awkward to the point of nearly making the film a suspense thriller. As an additional note, the promo text for the film suggests that Keane's daughter may never have existed - this is a red herring, the issue of her existence is never addressed and is not relevant to the film. A very visceral art flick that does not easily fade from memory.

*** out of *****

Perhaps this film makes more sense, or has more of an impact, if you're Jewish. The clever humor surrounding the story of a boy on the road to his Bar Mitzvah and his overly-competetive parents who seem to be on some other freeway is pleasant, charming, and infectious. The comedy is very well-balanced - not so light you'd miss it, but not gut-busting lowbrow. It also does a great job avoiding the trap of becoming a kiddie film. It's genuinely warm, family stuff. There's also plenty of in-jokes for Jews that manage to not be insulting - yet another wire-walking feat. Better yet, it's loaded with a full cast of recognizeable actors who may not be A-grade, but have performed compentently in the past. The general non-threatening tone and coming-of-age emphasis unfortunately blunts the impact and can only afford a watery resolution, but if you're looking for a low-calorie, feel-good, and funny film to break up the car chases and horror flicks, you could do much worse.

**** out of *****

Uma Thurman goes after killer

Wow, what a blast! This film makes nods to so many genres in so many direction and manages to not trip over itself in doing so. The anime sequences are unintrusive and the violence is a combination of Peter Jackson (eg Dead Alive) and Monty Python, upped to the nth degree. And lets talk about style - specifically, how much of it there is. The lines are delivered with class and the scenes are shot in environments that almost reach cartoony status. There's almost constant suspense and violence through the film and Tarantino's deep respect for the style is evident throughout. Lots and lots of fun to watch.

****1/2 out of *****

Uma doesn't do much.

Wow, what a letdown. What happened? Where's the huge fight scenes? Where's the classy dialogue? The only asian stylings and dark humor are left in corny parody flashbacks, probably the only entertaining part of the film. Additionally, it's over two hours and could easily have been condensed to 45 minutes. Instead, we're left with a pointless, dialogue-driven snoozer. The first film set the standard and the expectations for the second, but the second completely fails to live up to the promise. It's as if the budget was blown, the wad was spent, execs took over and removed the soul from the feature. Even the ending is disappointing - so much so that it makes you wonder, "Is that it?!?" It's such an awful shame since I can't recommend buying the excellent first volume anymore with the existence of this flat tire of a movie.

** out of *****

Peter Jackson's remake of the original

Full disclosure up front - I've never seen the original. Moving along, this remake is a perfect example of "too much of a good thing". There's one too many long, meaningful gazes between Ann and Kong. One too many slow-zoom crazed gazes by Jack Black. One too many T-Rexes (V-Rex?) attacking Kong at the same time. One too many unnecessary CG bugs in the ravine. One too many hours of film. And one too many ice-skating scenes in the park with Ann and Kong. Yes, there was only one of those and that was waaaaaayy too many, causing inadvertent laughter. What was done right, most significantly, was Kong himself. A very realistic and emotive character. The CG done on his face clearly and strongly communicated his feelings, intentions, and meanings in ways very easily translated by a human viewer. Also great were the action scenes, before they became overextended. The second hour of the movie was an almost constant barrage of rip-roaring excitement and eye-popping visual concepts (again, some laughable, like the brontosaurus pileup). You can't say that it wasn't fun, no sir. One would hope, however, that when so much time and effort is spent to create a realistic, believeable, lifelike character, that the same effort would be put into a realistic and believeable plot and script to put that character in. A fun, but flawed and overlong film.

*** out of *****

In essence, this is mainly a feel-good family movie, where the protagonist meets a challenge, makes friends along the way, and climaxes in the big confrontation that builds on all they learned in the process. Except that this family movie is about a guy running a shoe company that makes women's boots for drag queens. The humor in this one is generally mild, but present. The story keeps you interested as it plays out, but never really sinks hooks into you - possibly because it plays it safe most of the time. The exception to this is when our hero gets to the inevitable scene where he reaches rock bottom. Usually this involves the character having sunk so low that their actions make the viewer cringe. This was probably the most cringe-worthy rock-bottom moment I've ever seen in a movie of this type - I just wanted to die watching it...so you can imagine how bad it gets for our poor shoemaker. It's nice to watch overall and a pleasant entry into the field, but don't expect an enormous splash hit.

***1/2 out of *****

Biopic on sex-scientist Kinsey

As far as biopics go, this drama is held up more by the subject matter than by the man, himself. He's just not as personally interesting as, for example, John Nash from A Beautiful Mind. The portrayal is of a man with marital problems and not much else. The interest derives from his studies and the lurid microscope on his personal habits and interests. Liam Neeson is always great to watch and he does all that he can with the character, to his credit. The rest of the cast kind of fades into the background behind him. There are some throwaway and mild performances by Tim Curry and Oliver Platt (playing the same character as he did in the Impostors, which is distracting). The film is interesting due to the human interest and schadenfreude, but not due to the man himself.

***1/2 out of *****

Animated African Harry Potter-ish cartoon

Well, that was different. This would be the perfect cartoon for kids, with humor, valuable ethical lessons, entertaining characters, and a good folk tale. Except in the US, people will shun it because the entire cast (largely women) go around mostly naked from the waist up because it's an accurate depiction of African tribal lifestyle. The main character, Kirikou, is an infant who goes around totally naked. Lots of naked children. It's amazing it ever got released in the US (it took them seven years as is), despite the fact that the state is purely derived from the cultural. Disregarding that issue, it's really a fun viewing experience and just the right length. The dialogue may seem a little campy and stilted for American audiences, but the overall story is very Harry Potterish, filled with adventure and challenge. Definitely worth checking out to broaden your experience with animation beyond Disney, anime, and Cartoon Network.

***1/2 out of *****

Twisty LA detective comedy

There's a fine line between stopping a movie to ask, "What the heck is going on?" and stopping the movie to review notes. KKBB luckily falls into the latter category, featuring so many plot threads that they could've woven a sweater. The humor is snarky and, while billed as an action comedy, includes only a moderate bit of action. It utilizes quite a lot of 4th wall theatrics by talking to the audience, stopping the film, goofy narration, chapter titles, etc. It's extremely heavy on the gay jokes - so much that I began to wonder if there was too much gay humor. It's great right up until the ending when it suddenly gets both serious and seemingly bored with itself, throwing together a rather hasty and incredulous sequence uncharacteristic of the rest of the film. "Oh, wait!" it remembers during the epilogue and tries to toss three or four twists in at the last second that don't really change the film at all. The first 4/5ths of the movie is quite entertaining, fast-paced, and a challenge to keep up with, tho, and the ending certainly doesn't make it unwatachable - just out of tune.

**** out of *****

Fictional recreation of 1950's Swedish kitchen studies

At first glance, this film looks positively dreadfully boring. A movie about a Swedish 1950's study of male movement in a kitchen environment. What could be more fun than that? But there's a depth to this film. First, it's a comedy, albeit a foreign one that relies on subtle humanism rather than slapstick gags. Still, it got some good laughs out of us. Second, it's a story about the relationship between the researcher and the subject, which starts off with some quirky restraints - like that they can't interact. Overall, it actually mirrors a combination of romantic (without the romance) comedy style and buddy movies. Like most foreign films, it runs pretty slow for US tastes, and I would've preferred a different ending. Nevertheless, it was much better than expected.

***1/2 out of *****

Imagery, no plot

This isn't so much a movie as it is a series of slow, fast, and normal-speed images of urban activity and nature put to music by Philip Glass. Don't rent this expecting a story, characters or plot. The title means "Life Out Of Balance" and the film attempts to depict the clashing culture of technologically developed humanity against the environment. It's very slow for the first half hour, with dreamy music and pictures of clouds and desert. Towards the middle, some of the images are interesting to watch in high-speed as they move to the city. Altogether, the movie's imagery is dated and there really isn't much here. It's an artsy environmental statement.

** out of *****

Zany, heavily-influenced martial arts

This film is pretty much a combination of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, X-Men, Looney Tunes, and the Matrix. It's got loads of CG and wire-fu, probably more than actual physical combat. The main characters and bad guys are the extravagant equivalent of superheroes. Many scenes reflect a lifetime of watching Road Runner cartoons - literally, it has to be seen to be believed. And the last half of the movie borrows heavily from The Matrix, almost plagiaristically. You'd think that this mishmash would just be an ugly mess, but unbelieveably it works beautifully. Perhaps it's because kung-fu movies these days have reached a level of fantasy that easily slides into cartoonishness with little effort, but this film is wildly entertaining almost without letup. Many people refer to Quentin Tarantino when they mention the film, but I think it has more the style of Roberto Rodriguez, a frequent Tarantino collaborator. The flaws, such as some lack of exposition, underdeveloped subplots, and awkward stereotype depictions are relatively minor. Definitely worth owning for its unique sense of fun.

****1/2 out of *****

N/A

Xydexx explained it to me very well. Airplane was a silly, but stupid movie at level X. Top Secret was a more stupid movie at level X-10. Kung Pow...well, it's about X-100. Have you seen Steve Oederkerk's (sp? Director) Thumb Wars? If you liked that, you'll like Kung Pow. I did not like Thumb Wars. Thus, I found KP to be a groan-a-minute, almost entirely unfunny movie. I have no idea how this movie managed to attain a #1 slot in theaters for even one week during its original run.

* out of *****