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Three Izzard comedy stand-up shows

Eddie Izzard is best known in stand-up circles for his Dress To Kill show. Everything is compared to that as it is his pinnacle of comedic glory. I'm not sure whether it is best to watch that first or last. Either way, these three, neither his first shows nor his best, are shadows of his tour de force while remaining pleasantly engaging in their own right. I'm rating them all together because it's very hard to discern between them. In each, he jokes about animals, religion, James Mason, transvestism - all the same topics, the same humor, just with a few detours into other tentative threads. In the case of Definite Article, it's nearly a Part 2 of his previous routine, Unrepeatable, in that he starts that show exactly where the prior one left off. While his performances in each one is energetic and makes them easy to watch, he seems to start slowing down a bit in Circle, which is also the shortest show. The jokes bring lots of chuckles but few hard laughs. In each case, there's about 10-15 minutes of great stuff in the beginning and then they settle into mild-humored cruise control. All three feature the same mumbly, lose-track-of-the-monologue gimmicks. They also are each bookended by weird, humorless montages and garish intros and exits from the stage. If you're a fan of Izzard, these are worth checking out. Anything less, then stick with Dress to Kill.

Definite Article ***1/2, Glorious ***, Circle ***

Stand-Up comedy

I didn't know who Eddie Izzard was before I saw this and I especially didn't know he was a transvestite. Not that it matters, of course, in fact it adds a lot of color to what turns out to be a completely hysterical performance. I haven't laughed so hard in quite a while. His two hour monologue manages to repeatedly refer to earlier content, competently tying together various threads. The DVD menu content is very glam 80s, but at least I now know where "poking badgers with spoons" comes from. I've since added his four other stand-up DVDs to my NetFlix queue.

***** out of *****

First Izzard concert DVD, 1994

This is clearly a first outing from Izzard back in 1994. It shows in that the performance is bookended by technically interesting but comedically dead backstage scenes. The performance itself is audible during the main parts, but hard to understand when Izzard gets mumbly. This doesn't really distract too much because he's not really saying anything of importance, unlike future shows in which he adds meaning to the mumbling with hysterical results. The laughs are spaced out enough that one may get a little bored between them. Some are quite good, such as the cracks about animals and Star Trek, but the majority seem to be buoyed by what sounds like an artificial laugh track, which adds questionable veracity to the show. Generally entertaining, but I expect an improvement over the next several shows.

*** out of *****

Guy goes on 24hr tv.

On the other hand, we have a simple, lightweight romantic comedy. There's plenty of minor giggles and the cast is affable, if a little underweight in the substance department. The novelty sort of loses steam after the initial few days of the story, but the cute romance keeps it going a bit longer, tho the film could lose about 30 minutes and not suffer much for it. Don't expect anything too deep, but it's a sure cure if you've watched too many deep and meaningful dramas or gorefests (not quite as deep and meaningful). And, hey, you gotta like Ellen Degeneres.

***1/2 out of *****

Romance between Antarctic guides - oh yeah, and some dogs get lost

Half of this movie is spent watching two lovesick south-pole tour guides fawn over each other in a sappy, cliched, Hallmark romance that you've seen on any made-for-tv drama. It's so unspectacular and takes so much away from what the film is supposed to be about, that it's almost like interrupting filler, damaging the storytelling. What's meant to be happening, and on occasion is happening, are the trials of a team of sled dogs abandoned in a polar storm and left to survive the winter alone. What's supposed to be a sorrowful and harsh story of survival turns into a mechanical mockery. You can almost see the handler giving them commands - Sit! Whine! Walk over there holding this! Lay on the other dog! Throw in an animatronic leopard seal that looks like an unholy monster rather than its namesake and the film literally does become mechanical. And what tragic and heroic story of romance and survival is complete without wacky comic relief in the form of a goofy, Adam Sandler-like cartographer? Throw in huge plot holes, factual inaccuracy, bad scripting, and the fact that this story isn't based on true events, but "inspired" and "suggested" by them, and this is a hokey mess.

*1/2 out of *****

Should be rebellious vandals, but isn't

The first five minutes of this film are exceptional - it sets up our plot concerning a trio of young adults who break into houses and stack furniture and appliances, leaving notes against wealth and power, without stealing anything. It's very funny and leaves you expecting more. But you never get any more. Instead, as soon as we meet our anti-hero protagonists, it abruptly becomes a menage a troi relationship drama with all the painfully droll elements many bad foreign dramedys exhibit: very slow, insubstantially meaningful conversations; close-ups on faces; long silences; minor emotional challenges; etc. And then this goes on for over two hours. Interminable! It eventually does get somewhere after this long haul and we reach an unthreatening resolution with a single joke at the end, but it really wasn't worth the trip. It could've been told much better in 30-45 mins and with more furniture-stacking.

** out of *****

Bill Paxton finds God, then he and his kids go out and kill people.

Xydexx's choice for his birthday (wish him a belated one, it was 7/27). For some reason this movie strongly reminded me of Gremlins, especially the middle part. Heck, the middle part looked like it was ripped straight from Gremlins and CG'd the spiders over the gremlins. Right down to the evil cackling and giggling that the spiders made, voiced by the all-powerful, all-talented Frank Welker, may he live to be 1000. It took some time for the movie to get revved up, during which it was pretty darn stupid. And boring. When things got moving about halfway through, it became stupid and fun, which is kind of a good thing. Look out for the gaping plot holes. Yes, I know it was a parody/farce, but even those have general rules of continuity. FX needed some help, too, although they were adequately palatable. A few giggles, a few scares, but nothing ingenious. They need to think of some new stuff to joke about, the old cliches have been satire'd out.

** out of *****

Columbine redux

I've got an idea - let's watch a movie that leaves us feeling hopeless, miserable, and powerless. Make sure the cast is filled with normal kids from high school rather than career actors to make it look authentic. No narration. Let's get to know a multitude of students, particularly ones that are suffering abuse, hardship, or broken homes. Let's bring up the memories in viewers of all the experiences of high school, especially the torment and trials. Let's be very careful to make sure that the movie has no resolution or moral lesson whatsoever. Add in some token gay and black portrayals unconstructively, and tape on extended, uneventful, slow walks around the school. Then kill them all.

** out of *****

Christmas silliness from Will Farrel

I had initial hesitation about this film because I was never a fan of Will Farrel and folks seemed to turn their noses up when it's mentioned, despite the fact that it did blockbuster XMas business. Still, I wanted to see what the fuss was all about, and I'm rather glad I did. Rampant actor-driven silliness vehicle. The absurdity of Farrel taking childishness to extremes with clueless behavior gave me guilty pleasure, similar to White Chicks, where it should be too stupid to be funny, but I find myself laughing anyway. It's very light, predictable, and formulaic, but it competently pushes a good, upbeat holiday climax rather than pooping out towards the end. They also do neat tricks with forced perspective (must've learned from LotR).

***1/2 out of *****

Mariachi is mistaken for a criminal.

On a budget of barely $10K, Robert Rodriguez made this first foray into indie filmmaking. His style is reminiscent of Sam Raimi but, uneblieveably, even more comic bookish. It's a trial run and definitely rough in places, but it's still got a fair share of embedded humor and well-orchestrated action. It's definitely easier to watch than many other low-budget films of better quality. Likeable characters and a fun storyline. It is, however, the weakest of the trilogy.

*** out of *****

Mob flunkie falls for hunky guy

The film is actually called The Taxidermist, don't know where it gets The Embalmer from, but that's the title it hit the US with. Fully subtitled as a foreign film, it starts out with an interesting premise, but totally fails to run with it. For some reason, its hook is that the main character is vertically-challenged, and that oftentimes seems rather insulting, despite the end result. Much of the film is spent repeating the mantra of the details of the original relationship between the three main characters, you badly want them to move on and develop, but that doesn't happen until the last quarter of the movie, and it never really climaxes - just when you think it's about to go somewhere, it ends.

** out of *****

The rise and fall of Enron

Here's an excellent documentary on the tragic tale of the most grievous corporate collapse in modern history. Starting in the early days of its establishment, this documentary, narrated by the always soothing Peter Coyote, details the entrances and exits of the various major players at Enron, the fraudulent ties, the governmental liasons, and hints at secrets that may never be revealed that all lead to the abrupt and scandalous downfall of a company that lied its way to the top. If you think you know the whole picture, the story presented covers a huge amount of bases and will definitely touch on some facts that any viewer may not have known. The film doesn't dwell too long on any one subject, person, or topic, but makes its case clearly and with enough forcefulness to keep the viewer impressed with what has been revealed. It probably helps that the facts are so deeply sordid. I never though I'd be so interested in trading futures that I'd be able to sit through two hours of it. The author of the book that the film is based on is frequently referred to in interview snippets, so there's a noticeable marketing aspect, but there's so much meat that it's easily overlooked. Incredibly informational, enlightening, and serves as a dire warning.

****1/2 out of *****

Every cool dystopia movie meets 1984, Brazil, and Prozac

As Keanu Reeves would say: 'Woah.' I was definitely not expecting this film to go quite this way. The reviews are all over the map. Some say it's philosophical, others say it's dumb. Still others say it rips off of too many movies, but I say if it does it well then it can have 'em! Altogether creepy, crazy, emotional, and action-packed. I was cheering and wiping my eyes. The gunkata scenes are absolutely stunning, featuring an entire new level of cool, without the kung-fu or bullet time. Minor flaws include lapses in character and an absence of monitoring systems in a perpetually-monitored society, but easily brushed aside. This is a must-buy for me.

****1/2 out of *****

Mutant baby in dystopian future (???)

Here are some words to describe one of David Lynch's earliest films, Eraserhead: Bleak. Slow. Awkward. Gross. Depressing. Disturbing. Incomprehensible. Buried within this ponderous and relentless black & white montage of unhappiness is the first half of a movie, detailing the very unpleasant lives of two people who conceive a mutant baby out of wedlock. The story progresses a little further under that guise, and then ends. It utilizes imagery and elements that are likely symbolism, but Lynch has been silent about what they mean or, for that matter, what the entire movie means. He claims that it's up to the viewer to come to a conclusion. I say it's just a cop-out for making a very bad movie that might've had meaning when he started, but simply became the victim of the director's own dysfunction. Nihilistic and pointless.

* out of *****

Memories

Thank goodness for rational movies! But this isn't one of them. What starts out as a day-in-the-life becomes a quirky romance becomes a sci-fi mystery becomes Being John Malkovich. If you can follow this brain teaser, it's filled with dark comedy, bitter irony, and subtle background FX that enhance the story. It's really just a very basic, simple romance told overcomplicated. The characters start just quirky and odd, but it all gets explained as the film runs both in order and out of order at the same time. Unexpectedly fun and sweet at the same time without being overbearing. It's like two films at the same time. There's even a twist thrown in. Great stuff and a must-buy.

**** out of *****

Happy little girl goes bad, like a banana.

While the remaster of this film hits the mark for sound in many places, particularly a well-placed rear-audio and loud phone ring, it seems like only half the film was redone since it's very hard to understand some of the dialogue, particularly from Linda Blair later in the film. Rather than being scary, the film comes off as intense these days. It still has some pretty squicky moments, but they're from the doctor's office, not the bedroom (unless you're new to all this horror stuff). The film also climaxes abruptly, then ends slowly, leaving you wanting more (but don't. Avoid Exorcist 2). This may have been a classic in its time, but time has moved on.

*** out of *****

Cornea transplant recipient sees stuff

Chinese with subtitles. A very similar feel and scare method to The Ring. This film has some seriously creepy moments that left us screaming and giggling. Also nearly bloodless, so the allure is all in the scare. Unfortunately, the film loses it's pacing and intensity 3/4 of the way through and then jumps too far forward for a big-budget ending attempt which, while cool, is jarring. The elevator scene is probably the best scare I've had from a movie in a while.

***1/2 out of *****